I just spent all day at a waterpark trying not to ogle at teen ass, so spare me. I love women over 20y.o. with smoking hot bods, but they are disappearing faster than the earth's ice caps. Anyways, this update is a little appetizer I put together last minute and I will add to it later today. I also promise to include a bonus video. Dabney Conrad is a bad mofo. In fact, I consider any person a bad mofo who doesn't let their body degrade to a sloppy, doughy mess. I am tired of paying high health insurance because Jane and Johnny America can't go a night without cocktails or dessert. People who think walking a mile is the equivalent of climbing K2. Oh, by the way, all those shitty tattoos do not make flabby paunches look hip. Whatevers. Maybe I got too much sun today. brb

• Dabney Conrad
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